GET THAT THROWBACK POWER
 
Good day to you once again from the Cheeth. I hope my words find you well.

Well, Spring has indeed sprung here in Cheethdom, as it surely has in many of the places you inhabit, perhaps even the Land of the Neck Beard, where I have come to roam, lo these many days ago.

Inasmuch as the weather here is warming up and I am looking to the upcoming baseball season, perhaps we should review a few of the many thrift fashions sport has afforded us in its munificence, beginning with the 1980’s Houston Astros jersey.

A festival of fondue-inspired color, the 80’s Astros jersey is well recognized as one of the great old jerseys. Surely your heart would skip a beat if your eyes rested on it at the local garage sale.

For sports aficionados, it evokes pictures of Nolan Ryan hurling his Pre-Advil fastball. For thrift-only types, it calls to memory The Great Earthtone Rainbow, consisting of only brown, orange, and yellow. It speaks of a time when that bastard teal was only a twinkle in some sick logo designer’s eye, and we didn’t yet need iridescence or spandex to cheer our “Saved by the Bell” depressed periods.

Where does one look for exciting retro jerseys in loud colors, you say? Well, start with this funky orange Denver Broncos throwback – hot model not included.

And let us not forget the old-time sports t-shirts - the ones that simply say “#1”, or "Super Bowl Bound". We used to be free of complicated computer-designed logos and thick screen prints. A simple caricature of Larry Bird’s huge nose used to suffice.

 
 
Which would you really rather have, a slick, brand new red and black Tampa Bay Buccaneers t-shirt, reading “Super Bowl Champions”, or a skin-tight, peach colored tee, with an all-too Ace-and-Gary-Pirate-on-the-front, reading “HEY, HEY, TAMPA BAY”? The answer should be clear.

Last, but not least, the mesh baseball cap must surely be mentioned. These are in no way limited to baseball.

Such slogans as “Meaner Than a Junk Yard Dog”, “1985 KRAZY DAZE – CHEHALIS, WA”, or "Old Fart's Wife” are every bit as good as a nice Expos mesh hat. Wait, I need think about that one, actually.

Anyway, here at Niftythreads.com, we’ve certainly compiled a worthy pantheon of fine old sports items you can enjoy. Look around.

I dare say that what you’ll find here captures the true meaning of throwback, because we all know that a throwback wasn’t made a month ago and doesn’t cost $175.

 It’s more the jersey you dug out of the closet at school when the greasy gym teacher was slipping whiskey into his water bottle or the t-shirt your uncle wore every single time the Celtics were on TV.

Rap stars in videos will only wear throwbacks for another couple months, but true members of the Nifty Nation will be keepin’ it real forever.

Old school sports shirts are like Barry White – they’ve got that staying power.